Walker, Texas Ranger, To Kick Butt At Furman

He’s here to kick ass and chew gum. And he’s all out of gum.

Chuck Norris as Walker, Texas Ranger

Chuck is going to speak at Furman University.

Here are some facts you should know about Chuck Norris:

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise. 

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

More at ChuckNorrisFacts.com. 

You’re still searching on Hugh Hefner’s latest cradle robbing, Karissa and Kristina Shannon.

 

The Shannon Twins, Supposedly. I don't think it looks like them. They look a lot older. But, cute twins, nonetheless.

Also, you folks are exhibiting an unusual interest in Independent Development Accounts, or IDAs. More on IDAs here.

Basically, it’s free money for poor people to help them buy stuff. The sort of thing that helped lead to our current financial crisis. Fortunately, the website I went to said they weren’t currently taking applications for that IDA. “Program Is Full”. 

Wonder why.

Sarah Palin Abused Her Power By Acting Legally and Properly

The Sarah Palin Troopergate report is out. And it’s a doozy. How’s this for a story non-story? 

Sarah Palin found Guilty of Acting Legally and Properly In the Troopergate Scandal. Only in America. Only before an election. And only if it's a conservative being investigated.

So, according to the guy investigating her, Sarah Palin is guilty of abuse of power. His finding?

Governor Palin’s firing of Commissioner Monegan was a proper and lawful exercise of her constitutional and statutory authority to hire and fire executive branch department heads.

Trooper Wooten received all the workers’ compensation benefits to which he was entitled.

And the real problem? The final finding.

The Attorney General’s office has failed to substantially comply with my August 6, 2008 written request to Governor Sarah Palin for infomration[sic] about the case in the form of emails.

The main issue is that the guy investigating Palin wasn’t happy that he felt he wasn’t getting everything he asked for. He was personally offended. He wasn’t given the respect he felt he deserved. And, so, Sarah Palin was guilty of an abuse of power! Awesome. Too bad nothing like that kind of standard applies to those crazy Democratics. But, hey, that’s America. She did everything legally, properly, and–given Trooper Wooten’s record–she acted with tremendous restraint. But she’s a conservative Republican, so she’s guilty!

Um, All Hail Our Grand and Glorious Leader, Obamarama! Seriously, I’m all down with you. I don’t want to go to no camp after the election. 

 

Sarah Palin is Guilty. Of Stealing My Heart.